we're blogging at a bar
You're my little dorito
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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