i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
