Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
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