I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Green mimosas i think yes
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
