i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
