White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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