How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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