He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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