so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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