And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Randomize
