why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
