he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
That accounts for only three of the penises
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
