i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
