Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
