just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
