How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
