Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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