i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
