he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
