So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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