please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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