I'll bet she douches with gravy.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
