oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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