Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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