Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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