whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
My hand turned me down
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
