so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
