he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
