don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
