I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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