Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize