No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
