And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize