I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
