is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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