Define "chronic" masturbator.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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