It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
