Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize