You just made me feel so damn special
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
