if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
