She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize