Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
