all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Randomize
