if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize