She's JV to your varsity
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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