he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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