just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
