We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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