can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
My dick has a subreddit
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
