What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
