i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
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